Birthday

Today I turn 41 years old. I have to say that although I am irritated with my work- most other things in my life are pretty wonderful. I have a loving spouse who is emotionally supportive and giving- and he is the most amazing father to our daughter... I have a two year old daughter who is my miracle. She is funny, smart, creative, loving, and utterly beautiful... I have a loving and generous family who is always there when I need them... I have creative and interesting friends who inspire me... Things are good.

On the enneagram, I am a 4. The enneagram is an ancient personality classification system. The 4 is the tragic artist. We are creative, introspective, and emotional beings who focus on issues of justice- all pretty good things. We are also the one type on the enneagram that is constantly searching for that which is missing- not such a good thing. I want this year to be about being grateful for what I have- and not about focusing on what I do not have.

Synchronicity

Things in my work life have not been wonderful. I am a therapist working with disturbed youth- and for the first time, I feel burned out. In the classes I teach, I warn my students about vicarious trauma, compassion fatigue, and burn out. Those times when the work overwhelms you and you lose touch with your own psychological reality. I am emotionally exhausted. I need a break from caring about everyone else. I am labile and non-compliant. And when I am in this space, I don't take very good care of myself. I don't eat well, I don't exercise, and worse of all I don't make art.

So in the midst of this realization that things in my emotional world need to change- I see the Frida show. Another exciting thing that occurs is my husband buys me a brand new sewing machine for my birthday! During a mommy break, I am browsing around on the internet and I find a woman in New Zealand who is putting together a group of creative individuals who will work for the next year on Frida inspired outfits. So... I am joining them:-) I will try to post my progress here!

Hello

I am not sure exactly what to say.. except hello. I am hoping to use this blog to connect with others- find a community of mothers and artists- and to sometimes rant about politics, psychotherapy, and being a mother in her early forties.
I recently saw the Frida Kahlo retrospective at the SFMoma- and I thought about how much I have neglected the artist within me. I have been a Frida fan since I was fourteen. I remember crying when I saw my first Frida painting. Since then, I have fallen in love with many other artists and poets- but she will always be my first love. One thing I took from the exhibit was the importance of reconnecting with my creative self. Perhaps I can use this blog as a form of accountability.