Friday, November 5, 2010

Haiku my heart- bridge

one side of the bridge
is the constant overwhelm
the other side is peace

I haven't written since September.  I have two children under the age of five, I work full time as a mental health therapist, I teach at two universities, I am reading three theses (is that the plural of thesis?) for three of my students, I supervise interns, and I try to make and sell art.  I am in constant overwhelm and my poor little blog has suffered (my family is not very happy either.)

Lately, I have been looking more critically at this whole overwhelm thing.  Why do I overbook myself?  Is the constant buzz of being busy distracting me from something else?  The real problem is that in the past, I overbooked but always met my deadlines and met the expectations of those around me.  With two little ones, I am not quite so able.  A sick child (I have one right now) throws my entire schedule into a tizzy.  
I have been reading a wonderful book called "Healing Rage" by Ruth King.  She says that it is anger that I am distracting myself from.  She also talks about a fear of being still.  Something in this resonates.  The only time I feel still is when I make art.  It feels meditative... and I haven't done any of that lately either.  Something about this revelation feels so important right now.   I have to gather up some courage to be still and see what happens.  Anyway, that is where I have been and what I have been doing.  I have missed my Friday Haikus!   Anyone else suffer from a constant need to be busy?


joco said...

Dear me, I get tired just reading this. You certainly need to take a step back. Although that is often easier said than done.
Love the picture.
Hope this side of the bridge loses a bit of weight.

Boonie S said...

I’m quite the opposite. I seek peace and quiet. Perhaps you should think a little less about all of this stuff, and just take it easy.

All the best, Boonie

Noelle Renee said...

Hey dear,
I am supposed to be writing a thesis but I am in the avoidance phase and blog instead. I visited my family for the first time in 7 years two weeks ago in Santa Fe. I am trying to get started. I envy people who can stay focused but I also think you need to make some me time. you created such an incredibly beautiful haiku and work of art.. it is so lovely. Dwell on what makes you happy. Your children will connect with that too and perhaps give you some breathing room. Just a thought. The link is on my page this week. I did it for rebecca since she is in Mexico.Sign up there.

Faerie Moon Creations said...

Oh, I DO the same thing. And then I wonder after why I have done it. I feel the same as you as of late. I have felt stress but I've also felt joy, as well. Connecting with others in blog land and receiving support has helped so much. We're all in this together. Big hugs! Theresa

rebecca said...

this is the sweetness of haiku...letting go. paring down.
listening to the quiet in between the
so lovely to find you here. hoping you will give yourself pause.
sending you love and peace.
grateful for your beauty.


rebecca said...

sending you love...
and missing you!

rebecca said...

dear one,
i know you have a richly woven life full to the brim. i just wanted to reach out and send you love, strength, peace and happiness.

you are in my heart of hearts as i count my blessings.


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